Forward Thinking

Adapting to hearing loss

Laptop and pc developed serious problems for Christmas, all better now.

New Year frequently involves looking forward and back. When it comes to hearing loss I’ve found looking back frequently unhelpful, rather than how much improvement Sue and I (obviously, mostly Sue) have made in communication and coping I too often think ‘last time we did this or went there hearing wasn’t a problem’.

Like a film last night which we’d both enjoyed at the cinema when Sue could hear, she’d loved the songs and sung them for days. We don’t do that now and, frankly, I became rather maudlin. We were talking about a stay we’d had in Polperro and the restaurant where the lighting had been so ‘subdued’ we couldn’t see our plates. We now select eateries with good lighting so Sue can see what I’m saying as well as not having to hold my Zippo over the plates to see what tastes so good.

Those thoughts can undo what’s taken a lot to achieve, when I do get the mopes about what’s been lost I concentrate on Sue laughing at a well subbed TV programme or a DVD she’d enjoyed so much she talked about it for a couple of days, or something as simple as her pointing out a wonderful sunset. No matter how dramatically her life, and therefore mine, has changed. Rather than grieve for lost hearing etc. we find it’s better to accept and adapt. I shudder at the term “just get on with life” but the truth is that adapting is (in my opinion) better than fighting what’s been lost.

As Sonny and Cher put it, “I’ve got you”, a partner’s solid support makes all the difference for a successful life – even if that song did drive Bill Murray nuts in ‘Groundhog Day’.