Tea and cakes

September 16th, 4.05 a.m. and I’m awake, again. Yesterday I slept a little later, not much. Sue and I eat at a superb Indian restaurant last night and it could be that I consumed enough to clog a wheelie bin that disturbed my sleep. It’s still unseasonably hot and humid, could that be it?

More than likely it’s because yesterday was my father’s funeral.

Pa adored Sue, it was him who arranged for her to see a Consultant when she first had hearing difficulties and the waiting list was too long for (we’d naively hoped) a quick solution.

Over the following years Sue’s well being was usually the first question he asked when I rang him in the morning (every day) and again when I dropped in (every day) during the afternoon. He genuinely worried about Sue’s wellbeing and marvelled (no exaggeration) at how she coped with the problems of hearing loss and the Meniere’s.

Whilst arranging the service my main concern was that Sue was included. Liza Riggway, the Celebrant, was marvellous and said she’d provide a copy of her ‘script’ so Sue would know what was happening throughout the service. Tears don’t make for easy reading though. The service wasn’t easy for any of us. My big, tough, mates who always dropped round to spend time with Pa and I in the afternoons, shed tears as did I and Sue was inconsolable. But there was laughter and appreciation for the music which represented my father’s character so well; we left to the Goons singing ‘The Ying Tong Song’ from the mid 1950s.

Then there’s the post event gathering, Pa wasn’t a pub person and what we really wanted was an afternoon tea setting. I was struggling to find a venue when Rose, who runs Second Chance Animal Rescue the charity founded by my parents, suggested she and the S.C. volunteers could put on teas and munchies at her home where the kennels and catteries are. A perfect solution and very apt as Pa was still Chairman until recently.

The afternoon was a delight, hot and dry but the marquee and tents the charity uses for shows gave an element of a garden party as well as shade. I’d known I couldn’t be with Sue all the time, I’d have to do the mingle thing, so I’d asked my two close friends to keep an eye on her and make sure she wasn’t left out or struggling. They did me proud, no close protection officer or minder could have done better, Sue was in perfect company and cared for at all times.

I chatted with two Aunts who have hearing difficulties, neither use hearing aids and I pushed the idea of lipreading classes. I also showed a young second or third cousin (don’t understand those relation things) how to sign “name me” then fingerspell “Harry”. Which he did, as he left, to Sue.

But Pa left us better for knowing him and that is all anyone could wish for. I’m now Chair of Second Chance and will do what I can for the charity; there’s a non-hearing dog at the kennels needing an understanding home!